"I Wanna Be a Boy" is the theme song to Disney's animated television series Teacher's Pet and its 2004 film adaptation.
Intro[]
The intro begins with colored blocks adding Spot's body parts. Spot has fantasies. Pretty Boy stands on a newspaper. Spot sees the school and drools. Spot unzips his inside bones. Spot writes the chalkboard and Leonard's mother teaches. Leonard walks along with Spot. The cat says something. The students sing the chorus. Spot is diving under the sea. Spot grows his brain and Leonard shrinks his head. Leonard explains and morphs into a green monster. The mother teaches about something and the students point Leonard. Spot sings. The principal acts angry and Spot tap-dancing. Pretty Boy is in a cage and Spot is on television. The pet food appears and Spot still has fantasies. Spot fetches and takes bath with his pet friends. A black-and-white scene where Spot has a gross snot. Leonard and Spot morph dice. The show's logo appears.
TV Version[]
Singer: Born on the wrong end of the leash,
He was a dreamer
Chorus: And a little schemer
Pretty Boy: (Spoken) A dirty mutt living a dog's life
Singer: But when he'd hear the bell for school
Chorus: He'd start to drool
One day he says,
Spot Helperman: (Spoken) I'll take a chance!
Chorus: Trades his leash for a pair of pants
Singer: In a glance, school becomes his favorite pastime
Spot: I have buried a bone for the last time!
Singer (spoken): He says,
Spot: I wanna be a boy!
Kids: He's so over just being rover
Spot: I gotta be a boy!
Chorus: This teacher's pet's gonna be a boy!
Singer: Turns out he's a regular Einstein,
And Leonard is treading the fine line
Leonard Helperman: (Spoken) Why can't I be a normal kid like any other?
Mary-Lou Helperman: (Spoken) Now, doodlebug, listen to mother!
Spot: I wanna be a boy!
Chorus: Lost his collar, now he's a scholar!
Spot: I gotta be a boy!
Pretty Boy: (Spoken) Oy!
Chorus: This power pup's gonna be a boy!
Spot: I do not wish to be a dog
Chorus: Now this Bowser's ready for trousers!
Spot: I gotta be a boy!
Pretty Boy: (Spoken) You're pathetic!
Chorus: His nose is wet, but you can bet, this teacher's pet is gonna be a boy!
Spot: (Spoken) Yes!
.
Movie Version[]
(All talking)
Pretty Boy: Pants?
Spot: Check!
Jolly: Shirt?
Spot: Check!
Pretty Boy: Tail?
Spot: Tucked!
Jolly: Eyebrows?
Spot: Plucked!
Pretty Boy: Ears in cap?
Spot: Ooh, a table scrap
Pretty Boy & Jolly: Chow?
Spot: Demolished!
Pretty Boy & Jolly: Apple?
Spot: Polished.
World, here I come!
(Song starts)
Spot: Born on the wrong end of the leash,
I was a dreamer
Houses: And a little schemer!
Spot: A simple mutt living the dog's life
But the bell for school would make me drool!
`Til I came up with this clever ploy
Fire Hydrant: Which is to say, dressing like a boy
Dickens and Moe: Now he thinks he can take other pets a peg down
Spot: Hey, I'm a dog who's learned to keep his leg down!
I got to be a boy!
Cats: He's so over just being rover
Spot: Got to be a boy!
Kids: This teacher's pet thinks that he's a boy!
Squirrel: (Spoken) He's da bomb!
Kids: He's a regular whiz kid
Leonard: (Spoken) Yeah, but--
Spot: Hey, that's how it is, kid.
Leonard: Now that summer's here, you'll be a dog like any other
Spot: Leonard, haven't you always wanted a brother?
Leonard: Ugh! I wanna have a dog!
Spot: Hey, I'm off the leash now
Girls: He's eating quiche now
Spot: Got to be a boy
Kids: A boy, and nothing but a boy
Nothing but a boy
Leonard: (Spoken) Don't you think you're stretching?
Spot: Quit your kvetching
Kids: Got to be a boy
Leonard: Spot, you can fake it, but you'll never be a boy!
Spot: But soft! Could what he says be true?
Is this really just a phase I'm going through?
Leonard: (Spoken) I sure hope so!
Spot: Shall I go back to serving man?
Eat wholesome dinners from a can?
Who needs French and scoring goals?
Come on, let's bark and dig some holes!
(Spoken: What am I, nuts!? Leonard, wake up and smell the kibble!)
I've got to be a boy!
Leonard: Spot, sit and stay now!
Spot: What did you say now?
Kids: He's gotta be a boy!
Spot: I've got to be
Leonard: It's not to be
Spot: I long to be
Leonard: You're wrong to be
Spot: It's great to be
Kids: Great trait to be
Pretty Boy and Mr. Jolly: We hate to be
Spot: Can't wait to be
Emma: My mate to be
Leonard: Too late to be
Spot: It's my fate to be a boy!
Kids: A boy!
Leonard: A dog!
Spot and kids: A boy!
Leonard: A dog!
Spot and kids: A boy!
Leonard: A dog!
Kids: A boy!
Leonard: Dog!
Spot: Boy!
Leonard: Dog!
Spot: Boy!
Leonard: Dog!
Spot: Boy!
Leonard: Dog!
Spot: Boy!
Leonard: Dog
Spot: Boy!
Leonard: Dog!
Spot: Boy!
Spot: (Spoken) Boy!